I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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