I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
