too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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