I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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