Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize