He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Randomize
