You work out of a Hotel?
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
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my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
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Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
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