I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Randomize
