Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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