why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Can't talk, ducks in the car
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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