i just google imaged poop.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
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I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
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He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize