You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
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Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
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I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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