He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
