I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
There's always time for handjobs
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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