Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
