please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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