i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
