god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize