Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
