I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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