my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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