dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize
