You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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