dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Randomize
