I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
