You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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