It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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