Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
sex in a hospital.. check
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
