I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
