I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
