i jhust puked up my retainher.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
