the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
