Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
