On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
