thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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