and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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