Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
