I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize