my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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