The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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