he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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