You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Randomize
