Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
