You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Randomize
