I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
