Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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