Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
