Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize