May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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