Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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