Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize